Discipline

Myths about getting into shape that prevented me from starting. The game was portrayed by trainers and health professionals as such a Mt Olympus climb, I never wanted to even start playing. But since then, I have learned the lies and truths! Here is some of what I’ve learned! But have many more! If anyone is interested in getting coached on a similar journey I would love to help you! CoachSwavey.com

Myth 1: You need to know exactly how to work out

Myth2: You need to do Cardio to lose weight

Myth 3: Must know how to eat right to get results fast. I.E., count calories and carbs are the devil

Myth 4: You’ll need the Perfect meal plan for your type of body

Myth 5: You’ll need motivation to get started and to sustain

Myth 6: People in the gym will judge you if you don’t know what you’re doing

Truth 1: Just do any workout of any kind and get your body moving! This can be a sport, a walk, a hike, a bike ride, yoga, dance, or swimming! Endless options! Also like a zillion YouTube videos!

Truth 2: Lifting weights and gaining muscles burn more calories than cardio. Which we all hate! Myth   busted! Finally! Also, muscles are the most important thing to have in our later years!

Truth 3: Just eat smarter. Period. Carbs are ok, especially if you are going to work out! When you go too extreme too fast you end up quitting! Take it easy on yourself with small changes!

Truth 4: Nothing is off the table when it comes to food and no food is perfect. Nobody wants to eat steamed veggies and grilled chicken every day and you don’t have to! Don’t let people break down every single ingredient in food to where you end up with water. Again, smarter doesn’t mean perfect.

Truth 5: Motivation is a mood and moods aren’t a reliable daily source. Action creates motivation and learning to be disciplined is the key! It’s a practice and trust me no one at the gym is motivated every day! They go even if they don’t wanna!

Truth 6: If anybody did judge me at the gym, does it matter? Also, people are nicer than we think and when I first started the gym and didn’t know what I was doing, a gentleman kindly showed me how all the machines worked and boom, I’ve never looked back!

My BIGGEST lesson I learned was to make it EASY! I realized what was stopping me wasn’t the action, it was the thought that it was going to be too hard, and I would hate it! So, I went and did the minimum workout and every day I just tried to beat myself by the smallest improvement from the day before! Sometimes it was adding 10 seconds onto my warmup walk! I got stronger and before I knew it, I was doing things 3 months later that I never dreamed of 3 months before! I made tiny changes with my food and just started being more conscious of what I was eating and with that too it got easier and easier to make improvements!

My only 2 Goals from day one that got me here today. With no time frame!

  1. Eat smarter
  2. Learn to love working out

If you have had any of these myths stop you and you want help rewiring how we think about health I would love to help! CoachSwavey.com

My Reflection

Do yourself a favor and clean your mirror!
Here is what I have been working on the last few months! Learning to love my reflection! The most important relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself! When you have debris on the mirror it represents the negative in your life, the teacher who said you weren’t smart enough, the love interest who said you weren’t their type, the friend who said you wouldn’t get a mate looking like that but most importantly the you who believed them and told yourself you weren’t enough! I have been practicing for months self-love and it has been a huge success for me personally! Did I feel ridiculous at first! Absolutely! But the more I did it, the more I started to believe her! I have made my reflection my best friend and I have learned to support her and cherish her! I stopped looking for flaws and started encouraging her and complimenting her because she deserves it and she needs me! And at the end of our talk I give her a high five and send her off with the support she needs! If you want to know some of the example conversations I have with myself hit me up! I’d love to share how I’ve been showing up for myself and how you can learn to support you!
Concept from Mel Robbins and her book the high five habit! 💗 #selfloveiseverything #alwaysaworkinprogress #lifecoach #relationshipcoach #relationshipwithself #nofiltersheisbeautifulonherown #thehighfivehabit

Desire Management

Research shows the Top Two answers when asked “When are you drawn to your partner the most” are…
1. When I or my partner is gone and I get the chance to miss them
2. When I can be in the same room as them and watch them radiate amongst others and see them thrive in their element I get a sense that they don’t need me they want me. (Need is one of the top killers of desire)
If you are starting to feel a bit mundane in your relationship (as we all do) it is our job to manage the desire! Remember Desire is like fire, it needs air! 🔥💙 #awareness #relationshipcoach #desiremanagement #createalifeyoulove #notforallbutforsome #LoverOfResearch #StevenBartlett #EstherPerel

The Eraser Theory

It has taken me a while to come up with the proper verbage for what I have went through, when I tell my story I always say, “I’m not blessed or grateful for it but I wouldn’t change it!” Well I heard the right one today! Thank you @thematthewhussey “I wouldn’t erase it!” As I would lose all the value I have gained from the lessons I’ve learned! Whoever said “everything happens for a reason” is full of it! BUT you can choose to make a reason out of what you went through! I choose to help the me who desperately needed guidance years ago! 💗

Modern Loneliness

This is what Esther Perel calls “Modern Loneliness” and The new AI “Artificial Intimacy”
We are confusing being CONNECTED online with CONNECTION. We are using pictures online to be SEEN by others but none of which makes us truly feel SEEN. Social media is great but it is far from what keeps us feeling SOCIAL. We are a tribal species who need a village to feel safety and security to survive this life! The single biggest predictor of your future health outcomes in life are the number of close connections you have. Research shows 15% of Men alone have ZERO close friends!
So the challenge I give us all, is to go out and have a real in person conversation with your close friends! Don’t wait for connection to come to you, go seek it! Ask your friends “How are you doing?” and when they respond with fine/good or busy, ask again “How are you really doing?”Get vulnerable and let yourself be seen and heard and feel connected to real human beings! 

#SolitudeIsGreat #LonelinessHurts #LifeCoach #RelationshipCoach #CoachSwavey #LearningTogether

Intimacy

My favorite understanding of “Intimacy”
“Into me see”. Intimacy is to see and be seen
by your partner.
Great intimacy starts when the
orgasm ends, not 5 minutes before the sex starts.